gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
