WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
We left an ass print on the piano.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
