Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
