DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm just crazy horny about you
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Randomize
