Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
