Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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