I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
