Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
