She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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