Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
