how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
