I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize
