Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
