They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize