Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
