i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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