We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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