i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
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