It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I don't think brook has ever known best
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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