Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
