So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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