the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Randomize