Me too!
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Randomize
