my phone needs a breathalizer
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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