As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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