he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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