porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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