no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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