maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
