Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
