It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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