so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize
