Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
