glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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