I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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