Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
she woke up with a sticky ear
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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