Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
