There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
