And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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