Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
