I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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