Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Randomize