we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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