Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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