Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
there was a trapeze. enough said
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
