Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
