it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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