No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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