I just threw up on my dentist
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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