TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize